Well, the first episode of "The New American Gladiators" aired tonight, against the best show on TV (The Wire). Luckily I have that shit on DVR lockdown, so I could peruse this piece.
First off-Can the music. Awful, awful, awful. Second, Layla Ali has no business near a microphone. Hogan wasn't as bad, but he wasn't even asking questions before he shoved the mic into their faces. Example:
Hogan- "So, I hear you eat healthy and train hard for your skateboarding-"
(Hogan pushes mic into contestants face)
Contestant-"Yea, uh, well (garbage)"
Like the water under the jousters, better than the mats they had back in the old days. I'm almost certain that they're trying to pass off two men as "female" gladiators, however. Although I know that I'm going to fall inlove with Crush for the three episodes this show lasts. She's my new Jes (Just kidding, no one lives up to Jes, that's not fair).
Great start to the show: 3 minutes in a contestant breaks her ankle, followed by a GLADIATOR injuring his arm on the dumb ring race, and a contestant nearly getting into a fist fight with a Gladiator on the gauntlet. The highlight of the night, however, was during the first male event with the ball baskets, when with two seconds left on the clock the skateboarder gets speared by one of the galdiators, and from then on you knew he was baby poop.
One final note on this trainwreck: Get rid of Wolf. His gimmick is dumb, he screams after everything, he looks like a tired "Dog The Bounty Hunter" and he's obviously vying for a spot on the next "Big Brother" or something along those lines.
John's predictions for the show's life: 3-5 episodes
Actual lifespan: 15 years
First off-Can the music. Awful, awful, awful. Second, Layla Ali has no business near a microphone. Hogan wasn't as bad, but he wasn't even asking questions before he shoved the mic into their faces. Example:
Hogan- "So, I hear you eat healthy and train hard for your skateboarding-"
(Hogan pushes mic into contestants face)
Contestant-"Yea, uh, well (garbage)"
Like the water under the jousters, better than the mats they had back in the old days. I'm almost certain that they're trying to pass off two men as "female" gladiators, however. Although I know that I'm going to fall inlove with Crush for the three episodes this show lasts. She's my new Jes (Just kidding, no one lives up to Jes, that's not fair).
Great start to the show: 3 minutes in a contestant breaks her ankle, followed by a GLADIATOR injuring his arm on the dumb ring race, and a contestant nearly getting into a fist fight with a Gladiator on the gauntlet. The highlight of the night, however, was during the first male event with the ball baskets, when with two seconds left on the clock the skateboarder gets speared by one of the galdiators, and from then on you knew he was baby poop.
One final note on this trainwreck: Get rid of Wolf. His gimmick is dumb, he screams after everything, he looks like a tired "Dog The Bounty Hunter" and he's obviously vying for a spot on the next "Big Brother" or something along those lines.
John's predictions for the show's life: 3-5 episodes
Actual lifespan: 15 years
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